Growing up and all that jazz.

If you ask me, out of the blue, anytime how old I am, It'll take me a few minutes to answer. Its something involuntary. It's like I'm not just telling you how old I am, I'm realizing that fact too.
Something like-
XYZ: So, how old are you?

Me (Thinking....thinking....Realizes): 22....OH SHIT...I'm 22!!

Till a few weeks ago, I don't know why... but I was under the impression I was 21 and was turning 22 this year. So, my friend actually made me do the math. In an instant I had lost an entire year of my life and I had NO clue about it.

Stupid?? Yeah.

The once wise Meredith Grey (in her saner days) said, " We're Adults. When did that happen? And how do we make it stop?". I hear you Meredith. And i have no clue either. So, you can go on having fun with McDreamy, while I ponder over this one.

Its funny, because when we're kids our sole

aim in life was to grow up. "You wait till I grow up... "would be my favorite phrase. It'd be followed by stuff like, "..I'll vote for good people" or "...I'm gonna buy my own Dog, Mom." or "I'll pay for these broken plates, Dad!" or "I'm not gonna study anymore!" blah blah blah. I'd imagine adulthood to be sheer awesomeness. I'd have this golden aura around me and people would call me "the wise one". I imagined I'd have my own car. When people would ask me what I wanted to do when I grew up, I said, "I want to smoke!".

Its said when you turn 18, you're an adult, because you can get married and do 'big people' stuff. But 16 in the new 18 and 18 is the new 25, so I'm really lost with all the age thing. And if people were to give me any major decisions to make when I was 18, boy would everyone be screwed because I was a terrible 18 year old! The one thing i knew to do right was to look smart and stay quiet.

Now I'm a grown up (or that's what people like to believe). I still take my parents advise, I still break cutlery. I have no idea who I voted for (In my defense, I got my voters ID an hour before I had to go and vote, during the last elections), I highly disapprove of smoking , I've got my masters degree and I wan't nothing more in life but to study!

I've come to believe that we never grow up. There's no specific point in your life where a person will jump out of the crowd and say, "You're an adult! Congratulations!!" We just keep on changing. Its a dynamic thing. Evolution is the word, but at a more mental than physical level. (Don't freak out, we are not changing into apes again, though apes might be getting smarter than us!).

In our process of mental or spiritual evolution, we wish for a few things, we realize a few things and we are thankful for a few things that did or even did not happen.

Meta-physically speaking and according to quantum

physics, we are like particulates ....woah...okay, I'm just kidding :P None of that stuff. I have no clue about that. But you get what I'm trying to say, yeah?

But this thing, well it sucks.

And after reading this post, if your expression is like any of the following- ive got something to say to you:
(Left to right:)

1. The "I know...so?"- So you already knew what I'm talking about? Good for you.

2. The "The umm...what was this"? - Stop making that face. You look like Hannibal. And you'd want to check the title of the blog again.

3. The "Oh, i'll read it after my snooze"- Good Night. Thanks for sleeping on my blog.

4. The "Okkkkay. Next!"- Just go. Ugh.

5. The "OMG!! She's so awesome, i'm gonna cry."- Dude, Get a grip.

If your expression is not available on the list. kindly send me a photo and I'll get back to you asap.
How grown up is that?

Blehness

Thats the feeling I am going through right now.

Bleh-ness.

You know, its one of those days, you don't feel like doing anything. The thing is that I have been feeling this way since a long time. December, actually.

A few things one might do on such days:

1. Check Facebook. [Check!]

2. Check Facebook, every two minutes. [Check!]

3. Check email. [Check!]

4. Eat a gallon of chocolate ice cream. [Check!]

5. Think about all the weight you're gonna put on, eating all this junk. [Check!]

6. Eat a bowl full of Maggi and wash it down with a bottle of cola. [Check!]

7. Check Facebook and cyber-stalk a few people. [Check and check.]

8. Think about how dead life is at the moment. [In progress]

Sigh...

What i should be doing now, is study. I have finals coming up in a couple of months, two to be exact.

My situation is exactly this way. Imagine yourself in Switzerland, walking in the snow, between the snow covered Alps. You accidentally step on a twig... it cracks, you hear a roaring rumble and you feel and avalanche of snow coming towards you. You can see it now. You start to run, and you feel the ground give away beneath your feet. You have been walking on thin ice all along. And now you see the avalanche as well.

Oh, whatever. I'm gonna go watch Grey's Anatomy now.

Ciao!

Here and there...

Everything was so much better when we were kids. Seriously. And I know you will agree. I never remember being much of a kid actually. I was always the "big girl".(in age...and size maybe...lol) The person who rarely made mistakes...and is expected not to make any, the epitome of poise and the one who sets an example for their younger sibling...( whoever has met my sibling, will figure out tht either she hasn't learnt anything from me or I haven't taught her anything.The latter being completely untrue...)
I remember first meeting my Grandma at the age of 5, right after we landed in India after spending 4 years in Australia. Since then I was told about the responsibilities of a "big girl". "Minnie you are 5 years old...a big girl...you shouldn't behave this way", "A 6 year old big girl does not talk on the dining table so loudly".This went on..7,8,9,10.....19.
Even with all this big girl talk, I stole quite a few moments of childishness, which I have thoroughly enjoyed. Like for instance (this is totally disgusting) having burping contests with my sister (She ALWAYS won!) , digging up my uncle's entire vegetable garden...even uprooting his prized tomato plants, breaking my grandpa's camera by "accident"( I was just curious!!) and Oh yeah...this is fun...always being the one to blow out the candles off a birthday cake...irrespective of whose birthday it was...even my neighbours' !
But in all the process of growing up, I kind of "grew out" of these habits and I kind of miss them too!! Seriously...tell me...don't you ever feel like scooping up a huge bunch of icing off a cake when placed before you,( before its cut)...and just eating it off your finger!? Don't you miss that weird sound that comes out when you stand too close a cooler/ fan and speak in it? Or Making drums out of buckets and vessels and plates and give the performance of your life? Or try licking off that irritating drop of ice-cream or milkshake off your nose with your tongue in public? Ahh...!! Childhood! Innocence...and how I miss it!
We live in a society, which expects us to "behave ourselves", laugh softly in public, talk softly on the phone, keep our elbows off the dining table at dinner, follow etiquette better than the constitution. Sorry, please, thank you, greetings impresses me sometimes not always. Innocence is lost, forever i think. Its been replaced by "poise", "manners", "class", "falseness". I think we need to loosen up a bit. Okay...a lot. By saying this I don't mean we shouldn't be civilized at all.
(We need to be civilized too...not to spit everywhere you see a wall,Stay cordial with all human beings,Not to pick up a fight at the drop of a hat, not to bet on the outcome of the fight, help an old lady cross the street, say "excuse me" when you burp...I was crossing the road the othr day and this guy he burped in my ear...THAT was totally disgusting and he didint ever turn around and say sorry!!...amongst a million of other things!)
We just need to "cut some slack, off ourselves". Not talk business everyday 24x7. Mean it when we say chill out. You might be wondering why I'm writing this. Well its been building up and i don't see no reason "why" i shouldnt. I know someone whos put their 8 year old in an etiquette class. Dude, I don't even know how to spell this (God bless the inventor of spellcheck!) .
People are tutoring their children to be robots. Tightassed (sry fr the language) people of tomorrow who havn't seen daylight. I asked a kid if he knew how to play London Statue Stop. He looked at me as if i were speaking gibberish. It wont be long until the day that you ask a kid about hide and seek and they will toss you a biscuit. How many kids do you see in your locality playing out in the evenings. None in mine!! Its only me and my sis and a few friends of mine...when we have the time.

So im just saying...We should take it easy...even if its for a few minutes...go crazy once in a while (without getting high on drugs or alcohol or any such idiocy. A thin line divides innocence and crazy) .
So next time you see a hill roll down from the top, hear how your echo sounds like frm a mountain, when the wind blows let your hair down and feel it, lie down on the grass and steal a glance at the stars ( If you stay in mumbai, you wont see any...but try anyways...), spin so hard and suddenly stop and feel that dizziness tht gives you a high no drug on this planet can, sit on a swing...swing it hard and when its on its maximum swing let go of the swing and "Fly" off and scoop that huge chunk of icing off your uncut birthday cake. Steal whatever spurts of innocent happiness you can cuz however obvious it may seem, you have one life. Enjoy it.

And i never say ANYTHING...Until i mean it!

take care!!
:)